Back Into Your Arms
by Faith1600
Summary: Lily's past begins to haunt her, and its up to her friends to keep her from relapsing into darkness... my summaries suck... R&R!
1. Why?

**Title:** Back into your arms

**Rating**: PG-13 for later chapters

**Disclaimer**: none of these characters are mine; I own nothing RFR related... the usual stuff.

**Authors notes:** this fic is so farfetched its almost AU, but I hope you like it anyway...

"May I remind you class, that P.E is mandatory! You will all be expected to participate in our swimming unit unless you have a note from your doctor, your parent or a valid death certificate. So be there... or flunk."

Swimming, why swimming.... Of all the things, why the one I can't do... I can't ever face that again.... Mom will never give me a note. And I doubt this is a medical condition... why swimming? Why me. Why can't I jump into water without seeing... seeing... everything, all the memories I thought were lost, why do they have to come back? He's long gone, he's been gone for TWO years, why can't I forget?

"Lily? Are you alright?" Lily snapped back to reality to see Travis' worried face "you seem a bit, preoccupied"

"Just thinking Trav, just thinking...." It was obvious that this answer didn't satisfy him but he chose not to push the subject.

Suddenly the bell rang bringing Lily back to reality again, but it didn't last long, by the time she was out the door of the classroom she was lost in though again.

"disucky.... Why the does it have to be so disucky?" Ray was complaining again.

"Okay one, disucky? And two if you hate the food so much why don't you bring your own lunch?" Lily sighed, _it was the same argument every day, Ray complains, Robbie tells him to bring his own lunch and Ray says..._

"disucky, disgusting and yucky... worst of both worlds, and because I don't want to get up and make it!" _They were so predictable, don't they ever think of anything else to say? We have our great discussions of course, but everyday it's the same argument... it bores me. _

"LILY!" Ray was practically screaming in her ear...

"WHAT RAY?!? WHAT DO YOU WANT?" ... _did I just yell at Ray? He looks so hurt... why did I yell? Why is this happening again? He's gone! GONE GONE GONE GONE..... _

"Sorry Lily, its just, I couldn't get your attention... kinda like now, is something bothering you?"

"Huh? Oh, its nothing... look I've gotta go, ill see you guys later."_ Not the smoothest exit, now they'll really be worried... I had to leave, everything reminds me of him.... Why won't he go away? Why can't I move on?_

"Somebody tell me that wasn't odd..." Ray asked hoping desperately that he was just being obsessive and that Lily really was just having a bad day...

"It was odd, she's been like that all day... I'm sure there's something bothering her." Travis, he was filled with genuine worry, it wasn't like Lily to be so distracted.

"And she'll tell us when she's ready guys... "Robbie, who had amazing listening skills and was always ready to lend an ear...

Meanwhile Lily was running, she wasn't sure to where... she just let her feet tell her where to go... it seemed as if they knew they wanted to go somewhere... _I have perfect friends, a perfect life... why won't the past go away? Why... oh God, somebody help me... _she looked up and realized she was at the station... _station, perfect I can sit here for hours undisturbed... just perfect. _

"Hey swami, have you seen Lily?"

"Ray, how many times do I have to tell you not to call me swami? And no I haven't come to think of it. "

"She wasn't in math, I'm really worried..."

"I have a study period next... I'll check the station to see if she's there."

"Thanks ... swami"

"Don't call me that!"

A lake. It's so peaceful an underwater view... oh fish! ... I've been here before... I don't want to leave... NO... I wont leave... don't let it happen again! I'm here, you can't make me leave... let me stay! 

"Lily? What are you doing here? You missed classes! Lily...?"

"Travis... I"

"Lily, it doesn't matter what it is... you can tell me... we can help... please Lily?"

"I... it's complicated..."

"Lily... I'm sure I can figure it out.... I can help you, but you have to let me..."

"Well... it's ... two years ago –"

With a rather loud 'BANG' Ray entered the station... "LILY! There you are!"

WHY? Why... why did RAY have to come in right then... I was ready... ready to tell someone ... tell someone finally... I'd never told anyone before. I had to tell someone ... why Ray... why?

TBC...

**AN: Well what do you think? Tell me! Review!**


	2. The past exposed

**AN:** Short but vital... hope you like it. R&R!

Lily sat alone in her room... after Ray had burst in she had run out, claiming she had guitar lessons. _Ray looked upset again, but it was hardly her fault... now she sat in debate, should she call Travis? She knew she should but she couldn't bring herself to pick up the phone; she needed to talk to someone! Not Ray, that's for sure... Travis seemed a good person to talk to... _

It took all her courage but she picked up the phone and dialled the familiar number.

.â€¢.â€¢.â€¢.

"So you want to talk?"

"Yeah, I have to... but not with Ray around..."

"I understand... so talk Lily"

"Okay... so, it's, well I mean... sigh I haven't told anyone this, not even Ray... okay, here it goes, two years ago my mom had a boyfriend by the name of Josh... Josh was a bastard, he treated me well enough when mom was around, but when she left..." By now Lily's eyes were overflowing with tears, and her mind drifted back to the lake... the tranquillity... "I couldn't take it anymore... so I started cutting..." Lily showed her arm to Travis, the scars were barely visible but there, ten or so parallel lines "he was such a bastard, and I thought my life wasn't worth living... I walked out into the lake and sat down on the bottom." At this point Travis too was crying, silent tears running down both their faces but Lily continued anyway. "I was almost dead, then I felt someone's hands on my shoulders and they pulled me out of the water... at first I thought I was in heaven or something but then I opened my eyes, and saw his face... I'd tried to kill myself and even then I couldn't escape him... he just stared at me... then he started hitting me, over and over again. Mom broke up with him ... and... now, I cant forget... I can't forget him... every time I close my eyes I see him... I see that lake... why won't it go away? Travis please, help me... I cant live like this..."

"It's okay Lily, he's gone, its over.... I'm here now... shhh"

For an hour they sat like that, Lily crying and Travis holding her tightly as silent tears rolled down his face.


End file.
